Deanna's Story

“ I have always believed that women were capable of doing everything that men could do. In my opinion women have always had to fight harder to prove to everyone else that they were capable of achieving the highest standards of society, more than the traditional expectations of managing a household. Women who pursue their dreams despite society’s discouragement are the strongest kind of women. Women who fight the stereotypes everyday are the bravest kind of women. We live in an era where women are given the tools necessary to succeed in whatever they choose to do. Through the struggles we become stronger and when we face our fears, we hold the power to do anything we set our minds to. I found my strength when I started to believe in myself, when I believed that I could do anything if I worked hard. It’s not worth it if it’s easy.

My grandfather once told me, in my time of need, to “never let anything scare you so much that you feel like you have to stop living”. This was right after 9-11 happened and I was traumatized by the television’s constant reminders that none of us were safe. The surprising part of this story is that I’m from Maine and had only been to New York once with my grandfather and parents. I had never seen the Twin Towers. So my grandfather being the kind of man he was, took me to Manchester Airport. He made me watch the planes take off and that’s when he told me his legendary quote. It was a legendary quote to me. I lived by it.

He got to prove his wisdom to me. My grandfather was diagnosed with Leukemia when I was in eighth grade. He was always able to fight it until my junior year in high school. They gave him 6 months that fall. An organization that granted cancer patients their last wish before they died asked my grandfather what he wanted to do. He told them he wanted to take me to New York City. The date was set for November 13th, 14th and 15th. My grandfather never made it to those dates. He died October 13th. I was there minutes before he died. I was able to say my goodbyes. I promised him on his deathbed that I would find some way to make it to New York.

My first obstacle came during my senior year when I took a trip with my A.P. Government class to Washington D.C. It was my first time flying, ever. Ironically we were flying out of Manchester Airport. I prepared myself for the flight and the fear. I just kept repeating my grandfather’s words. I was told we would be flying over Manhattan and I was excited to see the bright city lights from hundreds of miles above. I was disappointed when all I saw were clouds the whole trip. With my hopes dashed, I just closed my eyes and rested my head against the window. Then the Capitan came on and announced that we were flying over New York City. I sighed. I tried seeing past the clouds but I couldn’t. Then out of nowhere, I saw a star escaping through the grey mist. Then I saw another. The cloud blanket had broken and dissolved in front of my eyes. I saw the lights, I saw for miles. I whispered to myself, “Well, I guess we made it together after all”.

A month after the trip I had to go on college visits. I researched colleges in and around Manhattan. I decided on three, Fordham University, New York University and Hofstra University. Hofstra University was last on my list though because it was on Long Island and not in Manhattan. So I set up a tour with Fordham and then tried to set one up with NYU but unfortunately they had no more available spots in their tour or information sessions. The only way my dad was going to let us stay over in the city was if I had two colleges to visit so I quickly called Hofstra to see if they had any available tours left and they did.

Fordham has two campuses, their main campus in the Bronx and another one in Manhattan. I had no interest in the Bronx so we just went to go check out the Manhattan campus. I was disappointed when I got there. Their school consisted of two very big buildings, a residence hall and the academic building. I wanted more of a campus feeling, almost a homey feeling. I then realized I wasn’t going to find that in the city.

The next day we woke up early and made our way to Long Island. I wasn’t particularly excited for this visit because I was convinced that I didn’t want to be that far away from the city. When I got there however, my perspective changed. The campus was beautiful, the dorms at the time seemed like a dream to me, my very own place away from home, maybe even my new home. Hofstra was only a 30 minute train ride from the city. They had an overwhelming number of different majors and minors and accomplished professors. It was a big campus which I liked and it made me instantly feel like I belonged there. I fell in love and knew that Hofstra was the best place for me.

I applied for early action to Hofstra, which lets you find out earlier than regularly applying if you were accepted or not. While everyone else was finding out their decisions in March and April, I found out that I had been accepted to Hofstra in December, a couple days after Christmas. It was a pretty great present. I didn’t apply to any other schools because I knew that Hofstra was where I wanted to be. Looking back now, I feel like that was a bad decision. Applying to a variety of schools increases your chances of getting a scholarship and seeing what else that college offers you. Nevertheless, Hofstra has given me some pretty great experiences so far and people that I will never be able to forget.

Freshman year was tricky. Financial aid didn’t give me a lot of money, even though my parents don’t make that much and my dad had just gotten laid off. So I had to apply for a pretty big loan. I didn’t have a lot of credit considering I had just gotten out of high school and a lot of people in my family, including my parents didn’t have good credit at all. It seemed hopeless that I was even going to be able to go to school at all. My grandmother, the one that was married to my grandfather mentioned at the beginning said she would cosign with me. After a little struggle, I was finally able to get a loan.

Sophomore year was still difficult as well but I was able to get a loan still with my grandmother cosigning. After the mix up freshman year with my loan, I wasn’t able to register for housing on time so I had to go into the random housing lottery. I was put into a six person suite with five complete strangers. Four of them knew each other and were friends from freshman year and the other one, my roommate didn’t know anyone either. Ironically we were the two white girls. Two of my suitemates were black, one was Indian, straight from India and the other was West Indian, whose parents were from Guyana.

Being from Maine, I was ignorant. There is almost no diversity in Maine; it’s statistically the whitest state in America so I didn’t know how it was going to be living in that suite. I wasn’t sure if they even liked white people, because if I were them, I wouldn’t. Even though I came from the whitest state, I had never been racist. I loved learning about different cultures and people. When I found out I was living with my suitemates, I was scared just because I wasn’t sure if they would like me but I was excited to learn from them and to see what would happen.

The first week of school was interesting. We didn’t really know how to feel about each other but they were nice and I was nice to them. Then the second week they asked if I wanted to hang out with them and I did. That night was the beginning of the best friendships I have ever had. Through the rest of the year we became very close and now we call each other family. I have learned an immense amount about their different cultures. They have opened up my life in so many ways that it would be impossible to describe every way. They are truly a blessing to me and I would never want to lose them.

Looking back I realized that everything does happen for a reason. Every event leading up to the present led me to the way I was supposed to go, to the people I was supposed to meet. The struggles have been worth it. The hard work has definitely paid off and the optimism that I force myself to have will take me far. I’ve come to learn that every obstacle is a chance to learn and knowledge is the greatest weapon against ignorance, against anything really. I plan to continue to learn and grow and to fight for those who do not have a voice, to give hope to the hopeless. This is my life goal and I am determined to accomplish it.”